@sauravmagarr

Sauravmagar @sauravmagarr

Instigator. creator. sometimes I try to write.

If you haven't noticed, I like relating things to animals. (Also, I just watched a documentary about birds of prey so I'm currently obsessed with them. Or as I like to call them,
@sauravmagarr

If you haven't noticed, I like relating things to animals. (Also, I just watched a documentary about birds of prey so I'm currently obsessed with them. Or as I like to call them, "air sharks.") #mondaymotivation

Defend what’s yours. Your girl, your man, your opinion — if you feel passionate about ANYTHING at all — by all means, defend it. When somebody insults your boyfriend or girlfriend, you’d better step up and shut that shit down. When somebody tells you that you’re wrong, don’t be timid — stand by your opinion. And, when somebody reaches across the table to snag a fry from your plate without asking, put a fork between their third and fourth metacarpal. (If it’s a first date and you hope to land a second, maybe try a wrist slap instead of a hand stab. You don’t want to come off too crazy too quickly — we still live in a civilized society, Sarah.) Okay, all French-fry fork-play aside, you get what I’m saying: If you care about something, defend it, fight for it — regardless of how overwhelmed, outnumbered, or unprepared you might be . . . Now, let’s take a field trip. The year is 1797 and the French have just invaded Wales, triggering the “Battle of Fishguard,” a short-lived conflict thanks to heavy opposition from everyday Welsh civilians not about to let French intruders call their city home. One such civilian’s actions were the very definition of defending what’s yours in spite of being overwhelmed and unprepared. Her name was Jemima Nicholas and she took it upon herself to get these foreign fucks out of her town. So, one night, she ventured out — quickly coming across a group of French soldiers in the midst of an invasion celebration. And what’s more annoying than uninvited guests? Uninvited guests throwing their own party. Armed with nothing but a pitchfork — and outnumbered 12 to 1 — Jemima disturbed, disarmed, and detained these would-be partygoers inside the local church. The following morning, all 12 soldiers surrendered to the British army and Jemima’s heroic actions are forever marked on her gravestone located outside St. Mary’s Church in Fishguard, Wales. (Huh, looks like forks are just as great at defending against French invaders as they are at defending a plate of French fries from an aggressive first-dater.) Well, you just learned some fucking history. You’re welcome. Now, put down your phone, pick up a fork, and go get what's yours.
@sauravmagarr

Defend what’s yours. Your girl, your man, your opinion — if you feel passionate about ANYTHING at all — by all means, defend it. When somebody insults your boyfriend or girlfriend, you’d better step up and shut that shit down. When somebody tells you that you’re wrong, don’t be timid — stand by your opinion. And, when somebody reaches across the table to snag a fry from your plate without asking, put a fork between their third and fourth metacarpal. (If it’s a first date and you hope to land a second, maybe try a wrist slap instead of a hand stab. You don’t want to come off too crazy too quickly — we still live in a civilized society, Sarah.) Okay, all French-fry fork-play aside, you get what I’m saying: If you care about something, defend it, fight for it — regardless of how overwhelmed, outnumbered, or unprepared you might be . . . Now, let’s take a field trip. The year is 1797 and the French have just invaded Wales, triggering the “Battle of

Your mind can do so much better than imagining two minutes of missionary followed up by five minutes of heavy breathing.
@sauravmagarr

Your mind can do so much better than imagining two minutes of missionary followed up by five minutes of heavy breathing.

I took my own advice to heart today when I decided not to proofread this tweet for typos and just fucking send it. And, even though it has an error, I'm fucking sticking with it.
@sauravmagarr

I took my own advice to heart today when I decided not to proofread this tweet for typos and just fucking send it. And, even though it has an error, I'm fucking sticking with it.

As I said earlier, “In a world of vanity, knowledge is the best form of mutiny. While everyone else is focused on their looks, rebel and hide your face behind a fucking book.” Here’s the deal: At some point, you’re probably going to get ugly — not everyone is destined to age gracefully — but your knowledge will always stay with you. Like an incurable STD, knowledge can be passed around, but never truly passed off. And, when you share it, you can do some incredibly cool shit with it. Like Banjhakri, Banjhakri and Banjhakrini a. k. a Lemlemey are shamanic deities in the tradition of the Tamang people of Nepal. The two are a couple, and possibly different aspects of the same being.They are supernatural shamans of the forest. In the Nepali language, ban means
@sauravmagarr

As I said earlier, “In a world of vanity, knowledge is the best form of mutiny. While everyone else is focused on their looks, rebel and hide your face behind a fucking book.” Here’s the deal: At some point, you’re probably going to get ugly — not everyone is destined to age gracefully — but your knowledge will always stay with you. Like an incurable STD, knowledge can be passed around, but never truly passed off. And, when you share it, you can do some incredibly cool shit with it. Like Banjhakri, Banjhakri and Banjhakrini a. k. a Lemlemey are shamanic deities in the tradition of the Tamang people of Nepal. The two are a couple, and possibly different aspects of the same being.They are supernatural shamans of the forest. In the Nepali language, ban means "wilderness", jhakri means "shaman", and jhakrini means "shamaness". Banjhakri is a short, wild, simian trickster who is a descendant of the Sun.His ears are fucking large and his feet point backward. Long, matted hair

Get off the internet and double-check your deodorant.
#sundaymotivation
@sauravmagarr

Get off the internet and double-check your deodorant. #sundaymotivation

Now that it’s holiday season and everybody is pretending to like hiking,trekking, exploring. I want to remind you that not everyone is going to share your vision, support your goals, or understand your passions, pursuits, and personality. Meaning, if you’re not already, you need to become your own biggest cheerleader. And, make sure you’re living a life that YOU feel like cheering about (pom-poms optional). Set your own course, define your own purpose, and blaze your own fucking trail — like Annie Smith Peck did (both figuratively and literally) as an educator, explorer, and expert motherfucking mountaineer. Born in 1850, Annie was the youngest of four, with three older brothers. She attended an all-girls grammar school and, upon completion, aimed to follow in the footsteps of her father and brothers by attending Brown University. She was denied. Why? Because she wasn’t a guy. Disheartened but not discouraged, years later, she decided to once again pursue higher education. Her father claimed it “proper folly” for a woman of her age (she was 27), she responded,
@sauravmagarr

Now that it’s holiday season and everybody is pretending to like hiking,trekking, exploring. I want to remind you that not everyone is going to share your vision, support your goals, or understand your passions, pursuits, and personality. Meaning, if you’re not already, you need to become your own biggest cheerleader. And, make sure you’re living a life that YOU feel like cheering about (pom-poms optional). Set your own course, define your own purpose, and blaze your own fucking trail — like Annie Smith Peck did (both figuratively and literally) as an educator, explorer, and expert motherfucking mountaineer. Born in 1850, Annie was the youngest of four, with three older brothers. She attended an all-girls grammar school and, upon completion, aimed to follow in the footsteps of her father and brothers by attending Brown University. She was denied. Why? Because she wasn’t a guy. Disheartened but not discouraged, years later, she decided to once again pursue higher education.

@sauravmagarr

"Put that blanket over your head, pretend you're a ghost, and float the fuck away from me."

You’re a fucking catch. And, anyone you date should fucking act like it. Don’t waste your time with someone who only wants to hang out at home, doesn’t invite you out with their friends, and is an all-around, keep-you-to-themselves kind of asshole. Find someone who is proud to be with you and wants to show you off. Like King Pedro (a.k.a. Peter I of Portugal) did with his second wife, Inês de Castro. You see, after the death of his first wife in 1345 (an arranged marriage), Pedro married Inês — against his father’s wishes — causing an absolute shitstorm in the royal kingdom. Why? Well, Inês was not of royal blood; thus, their union offered no political advantages. So, in 1355, Pedro’s father, King Afonso IV, hired three men to kidnap Inês, hold her hostage, and, well, cut off her fucking head. (And you thought your dad was bad because he bragged about owning a gun around your prom date.) Upon learning about this, Pedro swore revenge, but he was just a lil’ prince without much power. Fortunately for him, he didn’t have to wait too long to enact his premeditated plan. In 1357, Dad died, and Pedro became the new king — and his first order of business was to make good on his vengeful promise: He tracked down the three men who killed Inês and had their hearts ripped out while they were still alive. Because, as he claimed, they had done the same to him when they killed his love. (Pretty emo move, dude, but I can respect it.) Then, Pedro had Inês’ body exhumed, dressed in royal cloth, and seated next to him on a throne as the rightful queen . . . Dead, without makeup, and no fucking eyebrows (but probably with some kick-ass skeleton contouring), Pedro still wanted to show her off. So much so that he forced the entire kingdom to bow and kiss her dead, bony-ass hands. Now THAT’S a dude who’s proud of his girl. It’s worth noting that Pedro went on to become a complete psychopath of a king, known for his affinity for torture, brutality, and living heart removal. But, let’s not focus on that — let’s focus on how proud he was to be married to Inês, and how little he cared about the opinions of others.

Well, you just learned some fucking history. You’re welcome.
@sauravmagarr

You’re a fucking catch. And, anyone you date should fucking act like it. Don’t waste your time with someone who only wants to hang out at home, doesn’t invite you out with their friends, and is an all-around, keep-you-to-themselves kind of asshole. Find someone who is proud to be with you and wants to show you off. Like King Pedro (a.k.a. Peter I of Portugal) did with his second wife, Inês de Castro. You see, after the death of his first wife in 1345 (an arranged marriage), Pedro married Inês — against his father’s wishes — causing an absolute shitstorm in the royal kingdom. Why? Well, Inês was not of royal blood; thus, their union offered no political advantages. So, in 1355, Pedro’s father, King Afonso IV, hired three men to kidnap Inês, hold her hostage, and, well, cut off her fucking head. (And you thought your dad was bad because he bragged about owning a gun around your prom date.) Upon learning about this, Pedro swore revenge, but he was just a lil’ prince

@sauravmagarr

"That's a person, not an appliance."

This is my new favorite neon sign. It's either somebody getting a massage, a dude cautiously asking if his girlfriend is still mad at him, or a bro checking on another bro to make sure he's not dead. Regardless, nobody's getting laid — very few massage parlors actually do that, you pervy fucks.
@sauravmagarr

This is my new favorite neon sign. It's either somebody getting a massage, a dude cautiously asking if his girlfriend is still mad at him, or a bro checking on another bro to make sure he's not dead. Regardless, nobody's getting laid — very few massage parlors actually do that, you pervy fucks.

BTW, tomorrow I have a politics exams.
@sauravmagarr

BTW, tomorrow I have a politics exams.

Instead of being a whinny ass, turn your life into a pottery class. #TBT #Saturdaymotivation
@sauravmagarr

Instead of being a whinny ass, turn your life into a pottery class. #TBT #saturdaymotivation

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